Thought for the Month - February 2020

"What is Marriage?" by Barry Adair
(Marriage under attack?)

The union of a man and a woman, recognised by authority or ceremony, is as old as civilization itself and marriage of some kind is found in virtually every society. The definition of "marriage" has remained practically unchanged for thousands of years. Marriage is a monogamous union between one man and one woman. However, many now want this definition changed. Therefore, I wanted to look again at this age-old covenant and cornerstone of family life all across our world. And specifically, I wanted to find out exactly how God views marriage and what constitutes a true Christian marriage.

So back to fundamentals then, what exactly is "marriage"?

Marriage is a divinely blessed, lifelong, monogamous union, between a man and a woman.

The Episcopal Book of Common Prayer (1979) says that "Christian marriage is a solemn and public covenant between a man and a woman in the presence of God, intended by God for their mutual joy; for the help and comfort given one another in prosperity and adversity; and, when it is God's will, for the procreation of children and their nurture."

Today we have many who want to re-define marriage. There are those who want same sex marriages, open marriages, 3 person marriages and even marriages to your pet!

So, where did the marriage ordinance come from, what makes a true marriage and what does God think of marriage? We come across marriage very early in human history. So early in fact that we are told the following in the very first chapter of the very first book of the Bible…

"God created man in His own image… male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, 'Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth'" (Genesis 1:27, 28, NKJV)

The Bible then goes on to say that, after God created Eve… "He brought her to the man. And Adam said, 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. …Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 2:22-24).

God created us male and female, and through this "one flesh" marriage union, new families were brought into existence and our earth was populated. This life-long marriage union is both beautiful and simple in its purpose and yet is central to life on this planet. And Jesus Himself quoted from this Genesis 2 passage - see Matthew 19:4-6 and Mark 10:7-9. Jesus also attended marriages, we know this as His first miracle is recorded to have taken place at a marriage ceremony in Cana. Marriage was created by God and a true marriage is a loving, monogamous sexual union between a man and a woman.

So why change marriage and who wants to change it?

The demand to re-define marriage initially came from within the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer (LGBTQ) lobby. Mainly this has centred on allowing same sex couples to marry. And in recent years much of our television media, press and social media has got fully behind this change. And some churches have followed suit too. The Episcopal Church in the U.S., who I quoted from earlier, has allowed gay marriage since 2015.

Numerous countries now allow single sex marriage. In Northern Ireland, the first same sex marriage is expected on Valentine's Day 2020. Many here are now saying, "why not allow those who are in a long-term same sex relationship the right of marriage?" and "it would be unfair to stop two people who are in love the right to marry!" However, for Christians and others, simply put, it is not a marriage if it is not between a man and a woman. The Bible is clear that a marriage should be between 1 man and 1 woman (Genesis 2:24). This is the way it was always meant to have been. This was God's plan for humankind. A true marriage cannot be between 2 men, or between 2 women, or be polygamous. The type of marriage that God designed was a life-long, faithful union between husband and wife, with children brought into the world and nurtured in a loving family environment.

Of course, I can understand that some have no belief whatsoever in God. And what the Bible says is of no importance to many now in society. I also accept that everyone should be allowed to believe what they believe. Equally, I would hope that what I believe would be likewise respected. I believe in the model of marriage given within the Bible. And I believe that the Bible is God's word to mankind. And going against that model would be in direct opposition to God's will - whether you believe in Him or not.

The Bible goes further when it teaches us about God-honouring marriage. The "one flesh" union of a husband and a wife mirrors the supernatural union between Jesus Christ and His redeemed church.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25)

This mirroring concept is very deep and I find it hard to fully understand it myself. But I believe it shows that God views marriage as a sacred and highly exalted relationship. Marriage is fundamental to humankind and messing with marriage surely goes against the plain instructions of the God who made us.

And as I end for another month, let us remember that we have a God who made us, who loves us and who only wants the best for us…

"As the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you" (Isaiah 62:5)

And may we try to honour His name, by keeping His commandments…

"If you love Me, you will keep My commandments" (John 14:15)

Love Divine, all love excelling,
Joy of heav'n, to earth come down;
Fix in us Thy humble dwelling,
All Thy faithful mercies crown.
Jesus, Thou art all compassion;
Pure, unbounded love Thou art;
Visit us with Thy salvation,
Enter every trembling heart.

Until next month (DV)…

(All Bible quotations are from the NASB, unless stated)

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